Monday, February 28, 2011

Darla's running a book giveaway

http://mywinningyear2011.blogspot.com/2011/02/fantastic-giveaway.html

So here's my post to enter because I love books and I own a TON of them so winning them means Hubs can't give me any grief about them ;>

(He is a book hog too but I read books faster so I need to buy books more often - yes, that's my story and I'm sticking to it!)

Holy Crap! (not literally) - 2 goals crossed off thanks to a 2 lb drop overnight!

OK, so I felt bloated yesterday and had some residual "girl stuff" happening but, as you all know, I was really happy about hitting 210.0 lbs yesterday.

Now, here comes a lil TMI but I slept in this a.m. - actually had nookie last night with Hubs and ended up going to sleep around 2:30 a.m. so he let me sleep until about 10 a.m.

That's the longest chunk of uninterrupted sleep I've had in awhile.

Got on the scale after I went pee this a.m. and I was down 2 lbs!!!

AWESOME!!!

weight: 208.0 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, it was AMAZING to see!
In fact, here's a pic!
 

So that's TWO more goals crossed off as of TODAY!!!

**25% = 208.5 lbs by March 10, 2011 - CHECK!

70 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 208 lbs by March 11, 2011 - CHECK!

(Does this mean I have to put out more often???)

LOL!

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Hit a goal, & did a small vlog late last night

First off, I recorded the short video last night but I didn't have it uploaded before I went to bed - it was done though by this morning. If you are curious -- it will be at the bottom of the post :>

weight: 210.0 lbs

I am very happy about this! 210.0 puts me into the Obese category from Severely Obese re: BMI.

I've had a bit more of a struggle with motivation and stress since the year started and I was really worried that I might not make this goal in my assigned time line (which was more generous than I've been in the past).

I am down 68 lbs since July 23, 2010 and down 76 lbs since my post-pregnancy weight as recorded on April 4, 2010!!!

My next two upcoming goals are just a smidge lower than where I am now...

208.5 lbs will put me at a 25% loss of my July 23, 2010 weight and 208.0 lbs will put me at a 70 lb loss from my July 23, 2010 weight!


For motivational purposes, let me remind myself (and all my readers) of my achieved goals:

ACHIEVED weight goals based on my 278 weight as of July 23, 2010

Goal 1: lose 10 lbs by Aug 23, 2010 - CHECK
5% of my July 23rd weight lost = 264.1 lbs - CHECK
Goal 2: get to 265 lbs - CHECK
Goal 3: get to 258 lbs by Sept 11, 2010 <-- CHECK as of Sept 18th
Goal 4: total weight loss at least 23 lbs by Sept 23, 2010 - CHECK
** 10% of my July 23rd weight lost = 250.2 lbs - CHECK
Goal 5: get to 249 lbs by Oct 11, 2010 - CHECK (248.0 actually)
Goal 6: total weight loss at least 33 lbs by Oct 23, 2010 - CHECK (exactly 33 lbs lost since July 23rd)
Goal 7: get to 239 lbs by Nov 11, 2010 - CHECK 239.0 lbs as of Nov 9th, 2010
**15% of my July 23rd weight lost = 236.3 lbs (lower than I was when I first met Baby Girl's godparents in the summer of '07) - CHECK 236.0 lbs as of Nov 19, 2010
Goal 8: total weight loss at least 43 lbs (I'd be 235 lbs) by Nov 23, 2010 - CHECK 234.0 lbs as of Nov 21, 2010
Goal 9: get to 229 lbs by Dec 11, 2010 - CHECK 229.0 lbs as of Dec 10, 2010
**50 lbs of my July 23rd weight lost = 228.0 lbs - CHECK as of Dec 16, 2010
Goal 10: total weight loss at least 53 lbs (I'd be 225 lbs) by Dec 24, 2010 - CHECK 224.4 lbs as of Dec 27, 2010
** 20% of my July 23rd weight lost = 222.4 lbs - CHECK 222.0 lbs as of Dec 29, 2010
60 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 218 lbs by Feb 2, 2011 - CHECK 217.0 lbs as of Jan 25, 2011
Move from Severely Obese to Obese = weight of 210 lbs by March 1, 2011 - CHECK 210.0 lbs as of Feb 27, 2011

And here are my upcoming goals:

**25% = 208.5 lbs by March 10, 2011
 
70 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 208 lbs by March 11, 2011 

ONEDERLAND!!!! aka 79 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 199 lbs (lower than I was when I married my ex in May 2001) by April 11, 2011
 
80 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 198 lbs by May 11, 2011
**30% = 194.6 lbs by May 24, 2011 

90 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 188 lbs by June 11, 2011
  **35% = 180.7 lbs lowest long-term goal set by my naturopath by July 11, 2011 

Move from Obese to Overweight = weight of 180 lbs by July 13, 2011 

100 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 178 lbs by July 23, 2011 

**37% = 175.1 lbs current long-term GOAL

110 lbs lost from my July 23. 2010 weight = weight of 168 lbs

**40% = 166.8 lbs

120 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 158 lbs

**45% = 152.9 lbs current DREAM goal

Move from Overweight to Normal = weight of 150 lbs

130 lbs lost from my July 23, 2010 weight = weight of 148 lbs

**50% = 139 lbs (unlikely but I thought it would be nice to end the list at 50%)

Now, here's the short video from last night...

Kid post

Friday night, Son said that he wished that I could be his cuddly (term we use for the 2 older kids' stuffed animals that they sleep with) because I am "cuddly, warm and pretty."

My Son can be a real charmer sometimes :>

Shortly after my previous post, Baby Girl stood up in her playpen for the first time.

She pulled herself to a stand last wkend by grabbing the handle of one of the filing cabinet drawers - which was the first time she'd done it outside of her crib (where she's been doing that for awhile).

It's getting pretty exciting!

Though she's stopped calling me "Mama" and has started calling me "nummanumma" which is also what she says when she wants food.

ARRGH!

Saturday, February 26, 2011

My appointment today

It went well enough.

I was cautioned that my weight loss rate at this point is likely to be slower and that I should goal-set at between 1 and 2 lbs per week rather than more than 2 lbs.

I've got to reverse my other cardio (re: elliptical) - longer times on machine even if it's less intensity instead of upping the intensity for less time.

Oh and I think I may have mentioned that I bought a new shirt the other week (one with PINK in it)... despite more long-time scorn of that colour.

PINK!



EDITED TO ADD:

I guess I need to announce a winner now...

The winner is:

shala_darkstone said...

My best memory of spring is when birds built a nest right on the wreath hanging on our front door! We got to watch the eggs hatch up close.

Please watch your email for a message from me - and check your spam filter!

Getting ready for Dr. W

Have Baby Girl on my breast as I try to type.

Am to pick up 1G1D1Y in about 35 minutes for our appointments with Dr. W in Toronto this a.m.

I feel crappy - my head hurts, my sinuses feel clogged and my eye is itchy.

Taking a CLIF bar and a banana with me as potential snacks, not motivated enough to make hard-boiled eggs.

Hopefully my appointment goes well (I feel really comfortable with Dr. W which helps a lot!)

We aren't planning on hanging out there so I should be back at a decent time.

Having a small slice of whole wheat toast with a teaspoon of PB for breakkie.


No time for tea and Hubs left the travel mug (dirty) in the car actually, Hubs is bringing it in to wash it...

Friday, February 25, 2011

General catching up

Last night was the annual general meeting at the co-op I live in.

I think it went fairly well (although I did miss a chunk of the meeting while helping to count votes for the elections we needed to do).

We elected 5 new people to our Board of Directors (I am into my 4th year of serving on the board and am, once again, the President of the BOD) and our first board meeting with the new Directors is slated for the evening of Baby Girl's 1st birthday.

Today I made it out to the rec centre with 1G1D1Y and M. (and her smiley little man).  They did a hell of a lot of stairs and some walking and I did a good chunk of walking plus a measly 210 stairs (only counting going up the stairs and not down).

I ran one lap but my pants kept falling down, they were even sliding a bit when I was coming up the stairs.

Note to self:  retire any of my exercise pants that are XL - stick with the Ls!

Later this evening, our insurance adjuster is coming to pick up our claim-related paperwork.

You see, part of the way my anxiety and panic "presents" is me having a large issue doing paperwork.   S-girl and 1G1D1Y and even K. can attest to the fact that I am the worst person EVER for procrastinating on things involving paperwork.

Once S-girl did 4 or 5 years of my tax returns at once because I'd just ignored them for so long -- I got back a nice chunk of change, but I just really, really REALLY hate paperwork like that.

It's also, in part, why I ignored the advice of my friend (who was also my therapist for awhile) re: filing for disability when I was morbidly obese on top of my mental health issues (panic disorder, anxiety disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, depression and agoraphobia specific to crowds).

You see, the idea of having to submit details about my life for approval or even review makes me want to punch someone.

It makes me antsy and nervous and frankly, freaks me the hell out.

So I've been dragging my feet re: the paperwork re: the fire claim because it brings back all the stress and anxiety I was feeling at that time and compounds it.

Did any of you follow that?  Or did you just sort of nod to yourself that I can be a bit of a nutter?

Strangely - even WRITING (just now) about how that makes me feel has my neck and shoulder throbbing, my head aching and my heart palpitating.

*sigh*

Tomorrow, barring scads of snow, 1G1D1Y and I are off to see Dr. W.

It will be Son's first Kung Fu class on a Saturday (he switched class dates and times when he advanced to his solid orange belt) and then he's off to his father's.

I'm still struggling to find a good routine for getting things done around the house - and I'm hoping Hubs and I can really sort something out so we can really make a difference around here.

Step-Daughter and Son would probably both greatly benefit from a more orderly household, plus we'd really like to get them used to a happier and more organized home.

With Hubs and I both being the so-called favoured or spoiled youngest ones in our families (not counting my birth family of course) - neither of us were raised to take care of ourselves or our possessions or our areas of control (rooms, bookcases etc) and we don't want Step-Daughter, Son or Baby Girl having these same difficulties when they grow up.

But what is it to be "grown up?"

I still feel pretty young on the inside...

For Dinnerland

Women's Health Magazine - Blogs we love

Some of the bloggers I follow have mentioned this on their blogs and Hubs told me that he nominated my blog when he heard about it on Sunday or Monday (of course, since I frequently have sex with him -- I'd expect him to do something like that).

However; I don't know if multiple nominations are what people need so - just in case...

If you enjoy my blog, please nominate me (** please note, this does NOT mean that I will have sex with you - only Hubs gets that fringe benefit**)

http://www.womenshealthmag.com/features/blogcontest

To nominate my blog you will need to provide:

Your first and last name
Your email addy
My blog URL:   http://fat-angry-blog.blogspot.com
My blog genre:  weight loss
50 words or loss on why you love my blog.

Thank you for your support! :>

Since I am behind on my blog reading, I am not going to tag the others I know who are looking for nominations (in case I miss someone) BUT feel free to post in the comments if you are looking for nominations too.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

TMI!

OK, so now that my period is gone for another month -- I'm on day 2 of being constipated.

Yep, it's a thing.  Though I do confess that I am out of my Herbulk so that could be a contributing factor.

Today I have to take Son to the dentist and tonight we have our Annual General Meeting at the co-op that I reside in so there are things to do today...

Will try and catch up on some blog-reading throughout the day.

Have a good one, my friends!

Tipsy blogging?

I had beer tonight.

It's been ages since I had beer.  (And the fact that I got a buzz from Corona Light was surprising... shows how long it's been since I've imbibed alcohol).

Am going to post a few pics from tonight (Hubs was home with the kids) and a couple of cute ones of Baby Girl from earlier today, plus the flaccid cactus in the window of the tanning salon.






Wednesday, February 23, 2011

sort of a vlog



Had Hubs try to film me running a little bit... but he didn't zoom it so I thought I'd share...

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Get your entries in before Friday.

So, I'm going to leave my 1st giveaway open until Friday.

http://fat-angry-blog.blogspot.com/2011/02/csn-giveaway-my-1st-giveaway.html

Please enter, remember to leave your email addy and I will let the winner know via email.

The promo code will expire on March 31st so watch your email and spam filters when I announce the winner :>

Day 215 of my journey to health... Another drop!

Let me preface this post with the comment that Hubs and S-girl say I should round this down...

(1G1D1Y - let me know what you think)


weight: 210.2 lbs!!!













I am all excited! 

It's not March 1st yet, so I still have a bit to ditch that last 0.2 (though this sort of thing can torment me with fluctuations... so let's hope I just get it gone ASAP!)

Monday, February 21, 2011

vlog



OK so only one of the single dads I met today was the type of guy I'd give the classification of "hot" to but while I was crawling through the play structure - a number of other dads with kids paused to make conversation with me.

I usually made a quick reply and then kept looking for Son because, I'm happily taken and didn't think it was advisable to plop down and hang out with strange men while crawling around on all fours - LOL!

In all seriousness though, it was a different experience for me today. The hot dad I was chatting with was well aware that Hubs and I were together as we joined hot dad on one of the sofas.

But the dads who were talking to me in the play structure - that was odd to me. One actually said he was tired of chasing his kid around and was going to just stay where he was and relax and told me, "You should think about it."

Here's a short video of Son...

Sunday, February 20, 2011

A good day with a new NSV

So today I went out with Baby Girl, the magnificent K. & S-girl.

Hubs took Step-Daughter home because there was a big winter storm watch that had people feeling nervous and then by the time he got back from dropping her off, the storm watch was canceled.

But since Step-Daughter's primary residence is about 245 km from where we live, it's not like Hubs could turn around and go get her for the extra day (tomorrow is a holiday here).

Son had a fun play-date with K's boys while the girls went out.

Now, let me tell you -- I am not a fan of malls or of shopping.  Partly due to my anxiety and panic issues and partly because I don't have the best of luck trying to find things to fit me.

But today - I found 2 bras at La Senza that fit OK (if they'd had something bigger than a DD I might have had more luck but one style fit me in the 38 DD) and I was able to try on a couple of tops in two "normal" stores.

Meaning stores that I've either never shopped in before or haven't shopped in in a very, VERY long time.

One fit but wasn't as flattering as I had hoped and the other was snug on my chest but too tight on my tummy and wouldn't pull down to my hips.

Nonetheless, just the fact that I could find things that could fit/sort of fit was a huge NSV for me.

Also, I wanted to feel a bit pretty today - help stoke myself up for being out in public so I put some makeup on.

I think this pic was flattering...















And here's one of myself and the baby Girl herself...








We walked around the mall and tried things on for over an hour...

And, I HAD FUN doing it!!!

Shocking, I know!

How was your day?

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Thinking about an old friend & his family today...

I received the sad news yesterday that the father of one of my friends had passed away.

It made me sad, because although I haven't seen my friend, M. or his parents in a number of years -- they had all been a large part of my life in the late 90s as M. is also an ex boyfriend of mine.

His parents were awesome people with their own foibles and quirks and moments of genius. They were fun and loving and original and were always so welcoming of me into their lives when I was with their youngest son.

And even though M. and I were over many years ago, he and his parents always retained a special place in my heart because of the type of people that they were/are.

Greg was a real character. In the same sort of way that my Dad was. Big on tangents, a TV fan, lots of opinions (even if people didn't always want to listen at that moment) but when you came right down to it you could say, in all truth that he really loved his family.

I am so happy that he was there to see M. meet his soul mate, get married and have a wonderful daughter.

Because I've lost my parents too -- this hit me hard because I know how M. & his brother feel, as I've been there.

This isn't about me though, it's about sharing a sorrow and remembering a great man with fondness and love.

M. and his family are all in my thoughts and in my prayers.

Friday, February 18, 2011

CSN GIVEAWAY (my 1st giveaway)

Right now we are experiencing an unseasonable melt (which I love) and it makes me think of Spring. Lovely, green lush days of childhood, playing outside under the sun and using swingsets to reach for the sky!

Maybe the lucky winner CSN giveaway will use the promo code to buy something to use once Spring is completely here?

Comment with your best memory of Spring and I will look up one of those internet randomizers to pick the winner of the $40 CSN gift code.

CSN Stores has over 200 online stores where you can find anything you need whether it be swingsets, fitness equipment, sexy footwear or even cute cookware!

*Please keep in mind that the code will not cover international fees.

Thanks!

P.S. Please also leave your email address!

math time...

From and including: Friday, February 18, 2011
To and including: Saturday, July 23, 2011
It is 156 days from the start date to the end date, end date included
Or 5 months, 6 days including the end date

Alternative time units

156 days can be converted to one of these units:
  • 13,478,400 seconds
  • 224,640 minutes
  • 3744 hours
  • 22 weeks (rounded down)
So 22 weeks until I hit my one year anniversary of making healthy lifestyle changes.

If I lose 2 lbs a wk that will bring me down another 44 lbs by July 23rd.

My weigh-in this morning was

weight: 212.0 lbs

Take away 44 lbs and that would have me down to 166 lbs.  Remember 178 will be my 100 lbs lost number.

100 lbs lost in a year?  I'm getting there!!!!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Re-pierced

Done!!!

BEFORE

Baby Girl likes to stick out her tongue too!

AFTER

being a girl (tmi female stuff)

So I am dealing with postpartum period #2.

Because of this, I was surprised to see the scale drop at all this week as in the years between having Son and then having Baby Girl, I would almost invariably throw on 5 - 10 lbs a few days before my period would start and then go back down shortly after it was over.

It didn't happen last month or this month so I do hope that THAT continues! I still feel bloated but not nearly what I used to.

And this one is worse than the one last month but not quite as bad as I remember that they used to be.

But after going over 500 days without a "real" period - I can't really complain.  Last month's was uncomfortable as hell but not normal but this one, it's business as usual... except for the lack of water bloating weight (which i don't miss).

weight: 212.8 lbs

I feel like I'm in a bit of a slump.  Still not sleeping well and that really has an adverse impact on my days.

Was busy with co-op stuff this week (I'm the President of our Board of Directors where I live and on the Personnel Committee) so last night and the night before I was out at meetings.

With my period, I've been dealing with hormone-related headaches and cramps.

At the moment I am re-watching this week's episode of "Glee", sipping some tea (one bag de-caf green tea and one bag herbal lemon tea steeping in the teapot) and blogging.

Baby Girl seems to be really enjoying the Glee boys as "The Justin Bieber Experience" singing "Somebody to Love."

Son said on his way out to school that he thinks that he could sound more like Justin Bieber if he tried, but he thought the Glee boys were "OK."

The whole Justin Bieber thing is kind of entertaining.  I can't remember if I've mentioned it on here before or not but Son used to have a major hate on for the Biebs.

When asked why, his explanation was as follows:

"All the girls are in love with Justin Bieber and when I am a teenager and want a girlfriend, they will all be in love with Justin Bieber so I can't have one."

Once he finally realized that not every girl will be in love with the Biebs once Son is old enough to want to have a girlfriend, Son then admitted that he likes Bieber's music and hair.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Feeling more like "me"

I'm starting to have the urge to get my tongue re-pierced.

I originally had it done in 1999* and I had it for almost a decade but I needed to have a LEEP done and I had to remove all metal jewelery.

To my dismay, having the piercing removed for a day allowed my hole to close and I've missed it since.

Over the past few wks, S-girl had been wanting to go and have one of her former piercings re-done and it has gotten me thinking about my former tongue piercing again.

I asked Hubs today about whether or not he missed my tongue ring and I got him at a good moment because he blushed like CRAZY and didn't have a smart-ass comeback for once.

It was very cute!

I often give him a hard time (in fun), but I really do love him.  :)

So, the last time I had my tongue pierced - it got me to stop biting my nails for about a year before life stress caught up with me.


And if(when?) I redo it - at least I know enough to not try to eat a homemade  cheeseburger later the same day!!!

Hubs also said if I feel like eventually getting another tattoo (I've had my one and only tattoo since 1998)  he's cool with that as well because he thinks I'm starting to feel more like myself and more confident.

What he doesn't realize is that the other urge I have re: feeling/being more like me = shorter hair with a funky colour.  But hair has to wait until I am under 200 lbs.

I have a gargoyle tattooed on my thigh and I *love* it!

If I were to get something done on my other thigh, I'm not sure what I would do... S-girl suggested a statue of a stone angel or devil but, other than the fact I used to always say, "my horns hold my halo up" -- it doesn't resonate with me.

My gargoyle is another story... I think if I were a mythical creature, that I'd be a gargoyle.  I see them as strong, steadfast, a bit intimidating, always watching the world but never really a part of it because of the way that they are.

my tattoo

* - year corrected thanks to the memory of my friend (and ex-bf) M.

(yes, I am so old I can't remember years accurately)

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

my scale is working again!

Hubs bought batteries for it and installed them so I had to run upstairs, get naked and weigh myself.

weight:  213.4 lbs

I did get in 38 minutes at the track yesterday before my migraine got the better of me and made me think I was going to go blind and die...

Hmmn, I need to lose 3.4 lbs by March 1st to hit my 210 lbs goal.   13 days for 3.4 lbs... I'd damn well better do it!

:)

Tonight I have a meeting to go to so 1G1D1Y will be taking care of Son and Baby Girl for me.  Hopefully they'll go easy on her.

Son is very excited because he likes to spend time with 1G1D1Y's kiddos.

???

So, I have always been the type of person who supports and listens and helps when my friends need me.

In the past, part of doing that was a way to try and balance out the fact that there were things in my own life that I couldn't make sense of or control or change and so I thought that if I could help my friends in any way that I could -- I was doing an awesome thing because although I lived through some situations where I had no one during the worst of it, I would do my best to make sure that no one I cared about had to do that.

Did you follow that?

Now - in my past, I would do that even going beyond the point of ignoring aspects and areas of my own life.

It was always easier for me to place the needs of others above my own.

I think one of the things I have learned in my life is how to create some boundaries as well as learning how to address things that concern me.

One of the  biggest things I tend to do in my life is to talk about things.  I think about them.  I analyze them.  I blog about them.

Some things take a very long time for me to put them into the world.

And some things have never seen the light of day.

But, overall, when I look back upon where I was emotionally in my past - I've changed far more than anyone other than myself can realize.

Sometimes I think that the only way that my inner changes will show to the world is through the way that my body looks.

Because it really is all connected.

I do not eat my feelings anymore.  Though I still have the urge to -- but it's controllable now.  And I believe that soon, that urge, that need, that compulsion will leave me.

There are still many things I need to do on this journey of mine.

Still to come (and in no particular order):

  • lose more weight
  • start writing outside of my blog again
  • try new activites
  • learn to cook
  • clean and organize my house (and then maintain it that way!)
  • pay attention to my inner self and respect myself
  • learn to "girlify" myself a bit more
  • lead by example within my family re: positive change
*Edited to add*

A new beginners belly dance class starts on Monday, Feb 28th... guess who is signing up for 9 weeks?????

That's right - ME!!!!

    Monday, February 14, 2011

    The batteries in my scale died :(

    I was still 214.4 yesterday (which is what I weighed in at a week ago) but now I have to go buy batteries for my scale at some point today.

    I thought those things were supposed to have batteries that lasted for years or something as my previous digital scale was like that...

    *shrug*

    Hubs and Baby Girl and I had a lousy night's sleep - Baby Girl was really cranky - Hubs couldn't get back to sleep and I was restless.

    This morning - I have a lovely migraine.

    It's wet and icy outside as some of what was melting yesterday froze again overnight.

    I read "Dead and Gone" last night and am halfway through reading Robin Hobb's "Dragon Keeper" today (I bought them both early yesterday afternoon - so I ended up doing more reading and less housework than planned).

    That's it for now - but I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine's Day!

    Sunday, February 13, 2011

    Housework day

    First load of laundry is in the washer, other loads are "on deck."

    Hubs is going to work on the kitchen.

    Baby Girl us shaking and bouncing in her bouncer.  Son is still at his father's place.

    BTW - Son earned his solid orange belt at his Kung Fu Grading yesterday!

    Still working on increasing my liquid intake.  Did I tell you that on the days I do an hour of exercise I am apparently supposed to consume 17 cups of water (or comparable liquid like herbal tea)?

    That's what the about.com water intake calculator told me.

    It's crazy!  That's like almost eight 500 ml bottles of water.

    I'm averaging about 6 cups of herbal tea (or decaf green tea), a cup of orange juice to take my pills with and one or two 500 ml bottles of water.

    This has been one of my long-standing challenges with getting healthier.

    from the link (after answering the questions):

    http://nutrition.about.com/library/blwatercalculator.htm
    137.5 ounces of water today, or 4.1 liters.

    If you eat a healthy diet, about 20 percent of your water may come from the foods you eat. If you eat a healthy diet you can drink 110 ounces of water today, or 3.3 liters.

    Water is the obvious source for your daily fluid needs. Other good beverages include milk, herbal teas, low-sodium broth, 100% fruit and vegetable juices. Soft drinks will also count toward your daily total of fluid, just remember that sugar sweetened soft drinks and fruit juices add extra calories to you daily diet that you don't need, while drinking water may help you lose weight.

    Once I stop breast-feeding Baby Girl then it recommends:   113.5 ounces of water today, or 3.4 liters.

    But since I use measuring cups to measure (or base it on ml re: my water bottles) it equals 14 cups.

    A cup is 250 ml.  Hence why my 500 ml water bottles = two cups.

    Saturday, February 12, 2011

    What is it with men? TMI sex post

    Somehow, despite the fact Hubs and I rocked each other's worlds two nights in a row -- he's been Mr. Crankypants in the morning.

    So, basically, he's not getting enough sleep because my sex drive is creeping back and we're enjoying it.

    But really, are orgasms worth dealing with a cranky man in the a.m.?

    I can make myself feel pretty damn good all by myself should the need arise and I am NOT cranky in the morning afterwards.

    Sounds like a win-win solution for me and it would leave Hubs in the penalty box rather than somewhere far more fun.

    I always sleep well after nookie.

    You know how it's often portrayed in movies -- that the man rolls over and goes to sleep.  Well, in my life -- that's what I do (unless round 2 or 3 seems likely).

    I wonder if he can't sleep afterwards?

    Or is it  just the simple fact that I've always been more of a morning person (perky) than he is?

    Friday, February 11, 2011

    Visited my birth Mom and grandparents today

    Took a bit of a break (I guess) today and Hubs, Baby Girl and I went to visit my birth Mom and my grandparents.

    We enjoyed ourselves.



    Thursday, February 10, 2011

    Family Feud funny -- have you all seen this?

    Track closures - note to self

    Thursday, February 10, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Friday, February 11, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Saturday, February 12, 2011 -- 11 a.m. - close
    Sunday, February 13, 2011 -- 9 a.m. -5 p.m.
    Tuesday, February 15, 2011 -- 3 p.m. - close
    Thursday, February 17, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Friday, February 18, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Saturday, February 19, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Sunday, February 20, 2011 -- 11 a.m. - close
    Wednesday, February 23, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Thursday, February 24, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Saturday, February 26, 2011 -- 5 p.m. - close
    Sunday, February 27, 2011 -- 11 a.m. - close

    Wednesday, February 9, 2011

    Quick post

    Got my 5k walked today...

    Attended the last part of my non-violent crisis intervention training.

    Though, like when I took the CPR course, it made me all anxiety-ridden and panicky.

    Off to bed for now - didn't have much net time today.

    OH and before I sign off... I was reading a couple of articles re: how early solids are introduced to babies relating to obesity and how crap food can effect IQ scores.

    It made me remember those Maury Povich episodes about obese children.

    Here are the article links:

    Processed, Fatty Foods May Dumb Down Your Kids: Study



    Giving Baby Solid Foods Too Early Linked to Obesity Later

    And here are the 5 youtube links to one of those Maury eps...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrVJeHmHVEE - Maury part 1
    part 2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLloF0FAL04&feature=related
    part 3 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-H3xgBSgjSs&feature=related
    part 4 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alN064GeBG0&feature=related
    part 5 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QNYAmxX3dJA&feature=related

    For the record... because I was adopted - I was formula fed.  And back in those days it was popular to give a baby "sweet water" which was corn syrup mixed with boiled water in a bottle.

    Hmmmn...

    Tuesday, February 8, 2011

    I did 93 minutes at the track tonight!!!

    OK so I think I've mentioned that I can walk 5k at the track in 48 minutes.

    Well tonight I walked for 93 minutes... 1G1D1Y and I had a good time :>

    And very early this morning I went for a 30 minute walk outside after doing 17 minutes on the elliptical.

    But tomorrow night I do part 2 of Non-violent crisis intervention training (which was re-scheduled because of the snow last wk).

    And now - just because she's adorable - check out these pics of Baby Girl (showing her new expression that appears whenever I pull out the camera lately)...

    (and yes - we're in PJs)






    "Can't sleep... clown'll eat me"

    OK so I am not Bart Simpson but that ep comes to mind since I have not been able to get back to sleep after last breast-feeding Baby Girl at 4 a.m.

    I'm lying there in bed and I am just AWAKE and it sucks and I would rather be sleeping.

    I finally gave up and came downstairs in the hopes that I could either get myself sleepy by hanging out down here in the dark or that I could find something to do.

    I don't know that I feel like getting on the elliptical in my nightie but I just might simply because I have nothing else to do.

    I wish I felt inspired to do some writing of the fictional or poetic bent but I'm not in the mood for that either.

    *sigh*

    I will write about something embarrassing though...

    I don't know if this ever happens to any of you but very often after I've done the EA sports active workout, some other form of workout or sometimes even after some brisk walking I find myself suffering from gas, discomfort, nausea and sometimes diarrhea.

    I don't know WHY this happens but it is very uncomfortable.

    Sometimes I think it's related to my body temperature changing or something because I have sometimes suffered in a similar manner in the summer when I go from being outside and being warm, hot or seriously over-heated and then enter somewhere that is strongly air conditioned.

    Am I alone in this? Or does any of the above ever happen to anyone else?

    Monday, February 7, 2011

    NSV & a small drop on Day 200

    First, the weight update...

    I did get a 214.2 but then i checked and I got 214.4 the next 3 times.

    weight:  214.4 lbs

    I noticed that I have a small muscle in my arm.  I haven't seen anything like that in ages.

    video


    And yes, we still have our Xmas tree up - the box got wrecked and I keep forgetting to buy a bin to put it away in. I told the kids it's going to be a Valentine's tree...

    LOL!

    Sunday, February 6, 2011

    Is it bad that I don't care about the Superbowl?

    I don't even know what football teams are playing in it.

    That's how much I am not into sports.  The only sports I watch on TV are baseball - and then only if it's the Toronto Blue Jays and I love pairs and ice dance figure skating.

    That's it.

    I am keen on seeing the new ep of Glee that is supposed to air after the Superbowl but I think those things always run into overtime PLUS I am going to the track tonight with 1G1D1Y and M.

    I only did 15 minutes of EA Sports Active today because my kids were grumpy, but at least I got a bit of time in...

    I've been a bit quiet - sorry about that

    I've been having a rather emotional week and not in a way that I really knew how to express how I was feeling.

    I also had some eating issues and had an uptick but then dropped 2 days in a row so I am now under my last posted weigh-in weight.

    weight:  214.8 lbs

    There have been a number of times since my epihany post where I found myself feeling very vulnerable and emotionally fragile.  Lots of moments where a sudden thought would have tears welling up in my eyes, waiting to fall.

    But I didn't WANT to weep.

    And I didn't WANT to eat.

    And once I figured those two things out, I started feeling a bit more like myself again.

    I think I'll chalk this one up to changing hormones.

    re: blog reading --- I'm behind on that too so if there's any post you really want me to read and/or comment on let me know about it in a comment here on via email.

    Thanks!

    I also have a little update on goal clothing...

    I posted the following pics on Jan 19, 2011.


















    I took the next two photos YESTERDAY...

    They are still too tight to wear comfortably but look at this...


    30 days of photos - Day 30 - the last day!

    *this post was prepared in advance and set to auto-publish*

    Before finishing this journey -- I'd like to thank all of you who enjoyed this and commented and especially those of you who did 30 days of photos in your own blogs.


    I'm glad I did it... Now on to Day 30

    30. A picture of someone you miss

    This one is easy --- I miss my parents!

    Mom & Dad goofing around - don't think I was even born yet
    My Dad - 1982 I think - he died in 1993
    Son and my Mom (July 2004 - 4 months before she died)














































    Already done:

    1. A picture of yourself and 15 facts.

    2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest

    3. A picture of the cast of your favourite show

    4. A picture of your night

    5. A picture of your favourite memory

    6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day

    7. A picture of your most treasured item

    8. A picture that makes you laugh

    9. A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most. 

    10. A picture of the person you do the most fucked up things with

    11. A picture of something you hate

    12. A picture of something you love

    13. A picture of your favourite band or artist

    14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

     15. A picture of something you want to do before you die

    16. A picture of someone who inspires you

    17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

    18. A picture of your biggest insecurity

    19. A picture of you when you were little

    20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

    21. A picture of something you wish you could forget

    22. A picture of something you wish you were better at

    23. A picture of your favourite book

    24. A picture of something you wish you could change

    25. Pictures of your day

    26. A picture of something that means a lot to you

    27. A picture of yourself and a family member

    28. A picture of something you're afraid of

    29. A picture that can always make you smile

    Saturday, February 5, 2011

    30 days of photos - Day 29

    *this post was prepared in advance and set to auto-publish*

    29. A picture that can always make you smile

     There are a lot of photos that fit this category so here are just a few of them...

    Yes, Son went through a phase where he liked putting clean diapers on his head...
    My old friend Klaus & myself at Trasheteria in Guelph back in 1996

    My first pet - Snowflake
    Aug 2006 - my friend who I call "The Carrot", myself & my soul-sister - 1st & only time I've been go-karting
    Dec 2002 - Me, Son & the late great, Fetish the cat



















































































    Still to come:

    30. A picture of someone you miss

    Already done:

    1. A picture of yourself and 15 facts.

    2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest

    3. A picture of the cast of your favourite show

    4. A picture of your night

    5. A picture of your favourite memory

    6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day

    7. A picture of your most treasured item

    8. A picture that makes you laugh

    9. A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most. 

    10. A picture of the person you do the most fucked up things with

    11. A picture of something you hate

    12. A picture of something you love

    13. A picture of your favourite band or artist

    14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

     15. A picture of something you want to do before you die

    16. A picture of someone who inspires you

    17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

    18. A picture of your biggest insecurity

    19. A picture of you when you were little

    20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

    21. A picture of something you wish you could forget

    22. A picture of something you wish you were better at

    23. A picture of your favourite book

    24. A picture of something you wish you could change

    25. Pictures of your day

    Friday, February 4, 2011

    30 days of photos - Day 28

    *this post was prepared in advance and set to auto-publish*

    28. A picture of something you're afraid of

    I am afraid of death.

    I took this one in June or July of 2010 in Cobourg, ON.






















    Still to come:

    29. A picture that can always make you smile

    30. A picture of someone you miss

    Already done:

    1. A picture of yourself and 15 facts.

    2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest

    3. A picture of the cast of your favourite show

    4. A picture of your night

    5. A picture of your favourite memory

    6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day

    7. A picture of your most treasured item

    8. A picture that makes you laugh

    9. A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most. 

    10. A picture of the person you do the most fucked up things with

    11. A picture of something you hate

    12. A picture of something you love

    13. A picture of your favourite band or artist

    14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

     15. A picture of something you want to do before you die

    16. A picture of someone who inspires you

    17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

    18. A picture of your biggest insecurity

    19. A picture of you when you were little

    20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

    21. A picture of something you wish you could forget

    22. A picture of something you wish you were better at

    23. A picture of your favourite book

    24. A picture of something you wish you could change

    25. Pictures of your day

    26. A picture of something that means a lot to you

    27. A picture of yourself and a family member





    Thursday, February 3, 2011

    blog hop

    A bit of an epiphany last night

    So I know I've said before in my blog that I felt that part of the reason I gained weight was to protect myself.

    However; I thought that with my mindset where it's been and realizing that this is for my healthy and well-being and that because I've been doing so well that it was no longer an issue...

    Apparently I was incorrect.  Last night, when I was in bed trying to sleep, I was also fighting off an anxiety attack.  Because I just started thinking about how vulnerable we all are in this world.

    I thought about all the things that happened to me when I was a child and then as a teenager and then as an adult and I got really, really scared.

    And the worst part of this sort of thinking is that no one else can really and truly understand unless they've been through some similar experiences so I did not talk to Hubs about it.

    I just lay there, in the dark, trying to calm my racing mind and slow my thumping heart while some of the things that happened to me replayed in my head.

    It sucked.

    It more than sucked.

    It's bad enough that I've had to live through those sorts of experiences -- I really wish the random re-living of them would just stop.

    But it was like two parts of me were at war with each other... part of me, the part that's been enjoying a bit of girlification with S-girl (tanning, discussing eyebrow waxing etc...) was happy about feeling sexier and prettier and HAPPY but the other part of me was thinking things like, "If I get prettier, I get noticed, if I get noticed, that makes me a target, if I'm a target, I'm going get hurt again."

    Arrgh!

    I know I'm with Hubs and that those certain men of my past who hurt me in so many ways are gone, but I guess the emotional scars still ache and itch and startle me sometimes.

    All that being said -- I'm off to the track this morning to try and clear up my headspace and then probably for a tan to help me relax.

    I'm not giving up!

    All I want is a good night's sleep!

    Last night, Baby Girl slept for 7 hrs without waking (thought she did cry a few times and then conk out again) but Son woke us up 2x in the middle of the night.

    Once because he said an anti-smoking commercial he saw wouldn't get out of his brain and was freaking him out and once because he knocked over something in the bathroom.

    I'm seriously cranky this a.m.

    30 days of photos - Day 27

    *this post was prepared in advance and set to auto-publish*

    27. A picture of yourself and a family member

    Me holding up my half-sister - Aug 2006

    Dec 2008 - me & one of my paternal half-brothers


    My Dad & I - maybe 2 yrs before he died


    Both my Moms & myself - May 12, 2001


    My brother's wedding (I'm the tiny kid in the front)

    me, my brother, my 2 sisters - Jan 9, 2011


    our family with Hubs' parents - Dec 30, 2010


















































































    Still to come:

    28. A picture of something your afraid of

    29. A picture that can always make you smile

    30. A picture of someone you miss

    Already done:

    1. A picture of yourself and 15 facts.

    2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest

    3. A picture of the cast of your favourite show

    4. A picture of your night

    5. A picture of your favourite memory

    6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day

    7. A picture of your most treasured item

    8. A picture that makes you laugh

    9. A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most. 

    10. A picture of the person you do the most fucked up things with

    11. A picture of something you hate

    12. A picture of something you love

    13. A picture of your favourite band or artist

    14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

     15. A picture of something you want to do before you die

    16. A picture of someone who inspires you

    17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

    18. A picture of your biggest insecurity

    19. A picture of you when you were little

    20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

    21. A picture of something you wish you could forget

    22. A picture of something you wish you were better at

    23. A picture of your favourite book

    24. A picture of something you wish you could change

    25. Pictures of your day

    26. A picture of something that means a lot to you


    Wednesday, February 2, 2011

    Consuming my liquids - a struggle

    OK so I was doing really well for awhile with drinking my water and all of that. Then I started to sruggle a bit. The water is less appealing. Especially since it's cold and yucky.

    So I started drinking more tea - because tea is warm and comforting and that was fine but what I did not realize was that I was drinking a LOT of caffeniated tea.

    Sent Hubs to the grocery store today and now I have some decaf green tea and lemon herbal tea (I make a pot of tea using one bag of each) and I drink the whole pot (4 cups).

    I think that now that I've got decaf that I can drink two pots a day (8 cups) and then drink cold water for the rest.

    Hopefully this helps me feel back on track.

    I am also nervous because back in 2006 when I lost weight, I started to plateau between 208 - 220 lbs and I never broke through to ONEderland.

    So, I've been slacking on my EA Sports Active since I've been hitting the track and I really need to work on my daily time-management a bit more.

    Today the plan is some time on the elliptical and an EA Sports Active workout.

    Wish me luck!

    Who watched Dr. Oz on Monday?

    Here's what he said on his show...

    According to Dr. Oz:

    Best time to weigh yourself is - 6:30 a.m. (which is apparently when most Americans get up)
    Best time to exercise is ------- 6:35 a.m.
    You should have breakfast no later than an hour after waking so 7:30 a.m.
    Lunch should be at noon.
    Supper should be at 6:30 p.m.

    Best time of day to boost your metabolism is 8:00 a.m. and you should drink a glass of ice cold water.

    Best time of day to grocery shop is apparently 10 a.m.

    Best time to take fiber supplement is 6:15 p.m. (before supper).

    Though is this all based on what time the average American gets up?

    What if your regular time to get up is 7:30? Should you push everything back an hour?

    Anyone have thoughts on this?

    30 days of photos - Day 26

    *this post was prepared in advance and set to auto-publish*

    26. A picture of something that means a lot to you

    Because this one says someTHING not someone... it's not going to be of people - it's a scan of a pic of my eye that I wrote a poem on in 2004.

    My writing means a lot to me - even if it's mainly blogging only these days - it's something I've always done and it's an essential part of me









     












    Still to come:

    27. A picture of yourself and a family member

    28. A picture of something you are afraid of

    29. A picture that can always make you smile

    30. A picture of someone you miss

    Already done:

    1. A picture of yourself and 15 facts.

    2. A picture of you and person you’ve been the closest with the longest

    3. A picture of the cast of your favourite show

    4. A picture of your night

    5. A picture of your favourite memory

    6. A picture of a person you’d love to trade places with for a day

    7. A picture of your most treasured item

    8. A picture that makes you laugh

    9. A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most. 

    10. A picture of the person you do the most fucked up things with

    11. A picture of something you hate

    12. A picture of something you love

    13. A picture of your favourite band or artist

    14. A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

     15. A picture of something you want to do before you die

    16. A picture of someone who inspires you

    17. A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently

    18. A picture of your biggest insecurity

    19. A picture of you when you were little

    20. A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

    21. A picture of something you wish you could forget

    22. A picture of something you wish you were better at

    23. A picture of your favourite book

    24. A picture of something you wish you could change

    25. Pictures of your day