Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The slow-down

I realize with some trepidation that this is the slowest I've lost weight in awhile.  And I can attribute it to a number of things... stress, lack of sleep and LESS EXERCISE.

That's probably the worst thing right now... after doing Xmas shopping or visiting with friends and family and that sort of thing -- I just am not forcing myself to exercise.

My ankle is feeling better although it is still a little tender.  But I'm scared of doing something that will really mess it up.

With being busy with Xmas coming - I'm OK with slowing down because once all this stuff is over, it's back to normal.

I find this time of year really emotional even without a lot of the things that have gone on lately.

I know I mentioned my niece and her situation with my newest great-nephew having CF.  And I know I mentioned my blood relative with the severe addiction problem.  As well as my friend losing his father.  Then one of my dear friends had a miscarriage (and she's wanted a baby for a very long time). And one of my BFFs was very upset and crushed when her friend's 18-year-old daughter died of cancer.

Xmas is never easy for me because I have been a bit of a Bam Humburg-er since my Dad died in 1993.

If it was up to me, I wouldn't decorate at all.  I'm not crafty.  I'm allergic to pine and I personally hate the idea of killing a live tree just to have one in the house for the holidays. So I don't understand that.

I don't bake and I, frankly, don't need cookies and other sweets anyway.

I don't like the pressure of the shopping and the frantic scheduling required to make sure everyone sees everyone.

We get Step-Daughter on Xmas Eve (so Hubs is picking her up hoping around noon) then they will come straight back and meet Baby Girl and Son and myself at one of my BFF's home where we will do gift exchange and cookie decoration.

Xmas morning, the kids will have to scramble and open gifts before we head over to my birth mom's place to do Xmas with them before Son leaves with his father.

My adoptive family is having our family Xmas on Jan 9th and then we'll be done.

It's all so complicated compared to when I was a little kid and I only knew one family and only had one Xmas where everyone was there.

We don't usually do Xmas with Hubs family because of weather and road conditions plus timing.  Hubs will go in on his own to get Step-Daughter and to take her back but Son and I (and now Baby Girl) don't go.  I'm not good with the drive and the traffic in good weather, in winter conditions in south Western Ontario I get even more stressed and anxious.

It would be ideal if all our families were at least in the same town.  It would make scheduling much easier.

But that's not how it is.

Add to that the fact that the holidays ALWAYS suck because my parents are dead and well, you can maybe see why I am a Bah Humbug-er.

I do like seeing the kids' faces when they open presents and I love spending time with the people that I love - I just wish it was less complicated.

And this turned into quite the tangent.

To get back to the beginning - my mindset is rather poor at the moment but when things slow down and I can RELAX again - I will start seeing drops the way I like them from my scale.


  1. I don't generally enjoy Christmas either. I've had too many bad things happen during the holidays and it always evokes a lot of emotions.

    This year, I'm making an effort for my kids. They need to enjoy it, even if I don't. They deserve to experience all of the fun and excitement that the holiday offers.

    Slow down, but take the time to enjoy the little things. There's a lot of good that comes from the holidays. (Hugs)

  2. Thanks Gini!

    *hugs back*

    If it wasn't for the kids - I wouldn't bother at all.

  3. Sending hugs! I'm a fellow Bah-humbugger since my Mammaw passed Dec 30 2008. Christmas has turned into such a huge, month-long (or longer) event the last few years! There's so much to do that we end up stressing through the entire thing and no longer enjoy it. Try to slow down and enjoy seeing your kids get so excited! Christmas is so magical for them, it can be contagious :)

  4. Gord and I aren't Christmasy people. We don't exchange gifts or decorate ... though we do enjoy having time off from work.

  5. It's no wonder you're having such a difficult time - that kind of schedule would send me running for the hills. Still I see that you are mentioning some joys out of certain gatherings and that makes me feel better about you and knowing that you will be able to get through it.
    Here's a confession for you: I always take down every stitch of Christmas decoration on Christmas Day. My husband pokes fun at me for this but I just can't have it up any longer than necessary.

  6. I'm a "bah humbug" person too, since my Dad has his cardiac arrest two days after Chrismas in 1992. (He passed away the next years.) I relate this to the stress of the holiday season. I'm like Ellen--I get my holiday decorations down real fast, and I feel like I can breathe again.

    We can get through this and still continue on our weight loss journey. Take care of yourself as best you can--we're all on this journey together.

  7. Thank you ladies, i am glad to know I am not alone in these feelings.

    *hugs* to all!