On 3 June 2011 07:09, *somebody* wrote:
Hi FatAngryBlog,
I visited your blog and saw that you are into dieting/fitness. I think I've reached the lowest point in my life, so I really need your advice....
I've been struggling to lose weight ever since I graduated from college. I've tried diets, exercising, fasting... My problem is that I have literally no motivation and discipline.
I'm ___ years old, and *private information removed*. I feel like such a loser for being undesirable to men, and for gaining so much weight since college... some days, i just ask myself what's the point of it all? Even if I lost all this weight, I'll still look ugly and flabby =(
Do you have any advice you can give me on motivating myself to eat less and exercise more? It's such a vicious cycle.. I'd try and go on a diet, and be discouraged and end up eating junk food to comfort myself...
I hope you can be of some help - I really need it at this point. God Bless~~~~
Take care,
*somebody*
Here's the reply I sent (how do you think I did with it?):
Hi *Somebody*,
You know - it's really hard to say what will really motivate you. For me it was a sense of hitting rock bottom, of feeling like a failure and being worried that I wouldn't end up being alive to be here for my kids as they got older that finally got me into a healthier state of mind.
I know what it's like to have no motivation, discipline and willpower. I really do!
If it's that much of a struggle and you may or may not be sure if you've hit rock bottom where you will make a bunch of changes then I'd suggest trying SMALL, manageable changes.
Like, making sure you eat something on the healthy side within 30 minutes of getting up in the morning to help start your metabolism.
Or reducing your portion sizes at meals (without changing or adjusting what you are eating yet).
Or by increasing your daily activity (even if it's walking) by 5 - 10 minutes each day.
Those are just a few ideas.
Once you stick to a new change or alteration for a week, then work on that one a little more and/or add in a new change.
Does that make sense?
And hey, I'm going to be 39 this year -- so you have a *age revealing info removed* year head start on me ;>
Also - for me -- I CANNOT deny myself the food I like because then I crave it SOOO badly that I will end up purging.
For example -- If I have a craving for chocolate -- I'll have chocolate but instead of a regular sized chocolate bar, I'll share that chocolate bar with Hubs or a friend or the kids so I am only eating 1/3 of what I would have had.
It satisfies the craving without getting out of control.
I hope this helps!
Also - if you have a good relationship with your family DR - that's a plus. And/or if you can afford to consult with a nutritionist and a naturopath -- that can also be helpful.
But before you make any changes -- make sure you consult with a professional. Remember, I'm just a SAHM who still has weight to lose -- so make sure the choices and changes you make are safe and advisable for you.
Have a great day and good luck!
And start a blog (if you haven't already) because it really helps.
Cara-Mae
Then I wrote one more...
Just a P.S.
It might not be that you are unattractive to men... that might be a self-perpetuating reality that you could be creating with your attitude and energy.
Yes, some people (male and female) can be really superficial but all men have a type and maybe the men who would like you aren't getting the chance to meet you because, perhaps, you aren't as social as you could be because of how your weight is adversely impacting upon your self-esteem and self-image.
People always say that people can't love us until we truly love ourselves and that can be a real challenge when we are unhappy with some aspect of our physical self and/or some aspect of our life.
Hope that made sense to you.
cara
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